Overcome Inadequacy Caused By Social Media

Social media can be so insidious.

I was feeling pretty satisfied as I sipped on my good cup of oolong tea and finalized a post.

Until I scrolled through my carefully curated Instagram feed of happy things and good people. I came across a story of my friend treating his girlfriend to a fine dining experience. “Ah, that’s sweet of him,” I thought. I observed that she looks really happy. I smiled and thought, “that’s lovely.”

Fine dining. I’ve never experienced that!

Comparison on social media

All of a sudden, I started to wonder if I’m missing something in my life. Am I unworthy of that experience? Should I indulge in finer things in life? Be better to myself? Wait, is it because I suck so bad I don’t deserve better treatment?

Then that nasty sense of inadequacy filled me.

STOP! I am fine! Where did all that nonsense come from?

Well, these questions are all products of subconscious comparison. As much as I hate to admit it, part of me was comparing my life with theirs.

Forgetting your priorities

How do I overcome the inadequacy such incidents make me feel? I wasn’t even interested in fine dining in the first place!

That’s the reason it’s important to rein those irrational thoughts in. When we compare, we forget our priorities.

For instance, I’m not a fan of fine dining because I’m frugal. There’s nothing wrong with that. I enjoy a good meal at a good price, but a fine meal at an extravagant price would make me feel very uncomfortable. It was never about not worthiness.

Remember what you want in life, and don’t be influenced by what someone else has.

For some reason, humans have the tendency to want what someone else has. If you don’t believe me, just look at little kids.

We’re not kids anymore, but many of us still find ourselves desiring someone else’s toys or experience at times. We forget that if we constantly compare our lives with someone else’s, we’ll end up discontented, lost and living someone else’s life.

All that glitters is not gold. Before we feel envious about someone else’s experience, it’ll be good to first ask ourselves if we really want it.

“Am I envious because that’s what I want, or because they look like they’re having a better time than me?”

If it’s the former, work harder for it. If it’s the latter, remember you’re not looking at the whole picture.

Everyone is wonderful in their own ways, and everyone has their struggles.

Too often, part of me compares my life with that of others. I’m not as pretty as “A”, not as intelligent as “B”, not as capable as “C”, and not as sweet as “D”.

It makes me feel so inadequate, I feel like an “F”! But someone else may think they’re not as “insert description” as me too!

I forget that people usually post the best parts of their lives on social media. As we scroll, all we see are shiny happy people, things or experience at face value, while our life seem bland in comparison, or even difficult.

Some people compare consciously, some people do it subconsciously. Either way, it can plant a seed of dissatisfaction that grows and eventually sours us. So, don’t compare at all!

Everyone has their struggles, they’re just not shared on social media. We can all shape perfect looking social media accounts, but no one has a perfectly happy life. Yet, everyone has something to be thankful and happy about in their own lives.

Overcome inadequacy caused by comparison on social media

If you guys find yourself feeling inadequate when you accidentally fall into that trap of comparison on social media, remember these four points:

• Remember what you want in life, and don’t get influenced by what someone else has.
• Social media doesn’t paint an accurate picture of anyone’s life – it’s skewed towards perfection.
• Don’t compare, flowers don’t compare, yet they’re all beautiful.
  We’re all wonderful in our own ways.
• We all have something to be thankful and happy about, keep those things in mind!

If you’re mindful of humans’ tendency to compare, social media isn’t all bad. It can be very informative and supportive when used with the right frame of mind and attitude.

What do you think? Have you ever felt inadequate after looking at a certain profile/account? If you do, I hope this post helped you to overcome that inadequacy. Remember to count the blessings in YOUR life. Do share this on your social media accounts so others can benefit from it!

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