Why I Challenged My Preference For Fair Skin

Let me begin by saying this, the fondness for fair skin doesn’t have a racial association in the Chinese population. We have an ancient proverb that praised fairness of skin dating back 4 centuries.

I understand how sensitive this topic can be. My sole intention is to encourage everyone to be happy with their skin. If I said something that comes across as offensive to you, please tell me, and know that it’s not my intention to offend anyone.

The Proverb (一白遮三丑)

The proverb loosely translates to “a fair complexion hides unattractive features”. There are two other interpretations to the proverb:

1. Powdered faces conceal unattractive features: referring to the white powders ladies used on their faces
2. An outstanding quality of a person can blind you to his flaws

But the general interpretation used is “a fair complexion hides unattractive features”.

Ever seen East Asian ladies with long sleeves and long pants, a wide-brimmed hat and an umbrella at the beach? Now you know why.

There’re many proverbs that lost its influence over the years, but this one is here to stay. Even born and bred in Singapore, a considerable distance from China, its influence is strong on me!

Trip Down Memory Lane

Thanks to the tropical climate, most Southeast-Asian Chinese are not as fair as Chinese in the northern parts of Asia. Because of genes, I’m fair for a SE-Asian. I’m no Snow White by any means, and I don’t want to be – I’ve always preferred Belle! But only because she loves books and fell for a beast in a shabby castle instead of a handsome rich dude. Don’t ask me why.

Growing up, when people make a comment about me, it’s either about my quietness or my fair skin.

Even my mom seemed proud of my skin. Though she isn’t particular about appearance, she’s a believer in the proverb.

My mom hates it when she gets tanned. Naturally, she projects that desire on my sister and I. It hurts her when I get a sunburn, which happened like twice in my life. She’d be like, “why did you do that to your beautiful skin?”

My sister didn’t care too much about it, but I did. After all, it’s the only thing anyone ever noticed about me. My sis has a warm personality everyone loves. I don’t have any other noticeable trait – only quietness.

As a result, I tied a lot of my worth to the condition of my skin. If my skin’s not clear and fair, I’ll lose the only feature I can be “proud” of! I knew it isn’t true, but it felt true.

Present-day

When Anth and I resumed gardening this year, I experienced a struggle. My skin had lightened over winter, and I do think I look better in my original shade. So, to “lose” that again seemed a shame. Then I caught myself.

To think that way is a shame. I actually considered giving up the garden to protect my skin. Would that be worth it? My skin’s going to go south either way, but the experience of a garden would be with me forever. I made my choice.

Naturally, between the garden and my great week in Atlantic City, I now have a little tan. I found myself wondering about this fondness for fairness again, and I just had to challenge it.

I urged you to challenge and reclaim your idea of beauty and stop letting society decide what beautiful means, how can I hold on to a culturally-conditioned idea of beauty?

Whose bright idea was that?

I’m definitely not alone in my preference for fair skin. Entire societies place emphasis on it.

The Chinese, Japanese and Koreans have pursued fairness for centuries, Bollywood is dominated by fairer Indians, Filipinos have long associated fairness with class thanks to colonialism. In Indonesia, ladies use foundation in shades lighter than their skin color. 40% of African women bleach their skin.

The global market for skin lightening products is projected to reach $31.2 billion in 2024.

On the other end of the spectrum, Caucasians in western societies love their tans.

It looks like most people aren’t happy with the color of their skin.

In my research, it seems that it’s mostly women who face this problem. Why are we dissatisfied with our skin tone? Why do humans everywhere associate skin tones with beauty? How did something neutral become so laced with implications, often with divisive consequences?

Money and Power

We may not realize it, but it boils down to what fairness represents that get us all crazy about it. Throughout history, fair skin has been connected to money and power – better socioeconomic status.

Generations of us lived in societies where fairer people held places of power and comfort, granting them the ability to stay out of the sun. Sometimes, the fairer people were white colonists, sometimes they’re people of our own race, but paler for lack of sun exposure.

Similarly, tans became popular among the Caucasians because they represented a financial ability to take vacations.

In other words, history and conditioning are coloring our perception, and it will keep coloring our perception until we become aware of it.

The only reason we have different skin colors is because of the locations our ancestors were born in. The colder the climate, the fairer our skin. The more sun we get, the darker. It’s really entirely scientific. Underneath the colors, we’re all the same. We’re all humans beings.

This being the 21st century, we really shouldn’t still be tied down by rusty symbols of class and ancient perception of beauty.

It’s past time we look beyond the colors of our skin, be it race or natural pigmentation.

Time to Let Go

But to say that and still avoid getting tanned seems a tad hypocritical. Even though it’s not racially or class motivated, my “skin-view” is still tinted.

I do worry about losing my clear and fair complexion – what would I be left with? As if I’m just a shell, not a person with character, quirks, and qualities. My skin felt like my only redeeming quality – but I know this feeling is just an echo from my childhood. It’s a silly notion that should be “fixed”.

I don’t want to be part of the ideal skin tone/quality chase anymore. Instead, I want to embrace my skin and let go of that desire to remain fair and clear-skinned.

My skin will look different with changing activities, seasons, geographical locations and age, and it’s all okay. It’s as natural as leaves turning in the fall, all a part of being alive.

It doesn’t mean that I’m letting everything slide. I keep my skin clean and moisturized, make sure I eat balanced and mostly-healthy meals, and not stay in the sun for too long without sun-protection. Taking care of my skin is a responsibility, fussing over its shade is stupidity.

Don’t be part of the discrimination

Now that I read about those two other interpretations of the poet’s proverb, I think that the two interpretations seem more likely to be what he meant. Perhaps the society, with its emphasis on beauty, took it out of context as time passed.

On a more serious note, I know how bad racial discrimination can get, and fairer folks do get better opportunities in certain societies (like in the Philippines) or industries (e.g. Bollywood). It is unfair. I see these as extra motivation to accept my own skin.

If I perceive fair skin as better, I’m part of the discrimination problem, even if it’s my own skin.

I highly recommend that you’ll embrace your own skin tone and make peace with your skin too. If we stop making beauty a skin tone, maybe someday, women around the world won’t need to risk their lives bleaching their skin.

We’re so much more than our appearance. Let your inner beauty define you instead!